Gaming while neurodivergent in late stage capitalism

Games are amazing. They can teach us so many amazing things. Let us take control in situations so alien and impossible, that we have literal paradigm shifts. They can open our minds to the experiences of others and understand them in a way we never would otherwise. They can teach us things we never knew we needed. Expand our horizons, problem solving and social skills, empathy, imagination, and knowledge in ways we never dreamed of. They can keep us sane and stable when we’re on the edge of breaking and provide a safe escape from the toil and exhaustion of daily work. They can allow us to meet people, find friends, and even fall in love with others who share our experience of the game. They can connect family and friends who physically cannot get together, and let them have fun and strengthen their bonds. They can be so many things there’s a whole field of scientific study trying to make sense of it all. But…

Games are amazing. But they’re also a gigantic industry with huge corporations involved. Anyone with the right amount of resources can make a game. But that means who makes games are mostly soulless corporations that only want to exploit for the benefit of the already too rich. Yes, there’s a lot of indie games there, but the barrier to entry in their case is significant. You have to be able to play them, and not everyone can. It’s not a matter of price, but the way we have been programmed (sic!) to expect very different things from a game. Yes, the A-level industry has made us expect a standard of games that puts a wall between us and the indie scene. It’s just like the unrealistic body stereotypes the media feeds us, the toxic image of masculinity, or the sexuality and gender stereotypes – it’s something we’ve been fed our whole lives to the point we don’t even see them at work. Why is it that a decades old mainstream game still has appeal to you, but a way better indie title with the same level of art, style, and mechanics complexity doesn’t? This is how the industry gets you. Usually as a child who can’t see what’s being done to them, only to realise as an adult how it’s harmful and stifles their potential to enjoy way much more… for so much less money, that will also entirely or mostly go to the people who made it. But that’s not all that lurks beneath the colourful graphics and fun gameplay.

Have you ever played a game that wasn’t that fun, story-rich, or one that doesn’t have exciting gameplay but consumed your time and attention entirely? Was there ever a time when you noticed a game is literally hurting you by taking away time and attention you needed for important things?

If yes, you might have ADHD or be neurodivergent. Or both. And you’re fucked.

We’re easy prey for all kinds of exploitative mechanics that unscrupulous people will put in games to keep our attention and milk us for all the money they can extract. Predatory gamedev practices are a staple of the high-budget gaming industry. Yes, smaller titles can make use of the same tactics, but the amount of harm they can do is usually limited. Because they don’t have the resources, or the guts to go whole hog on lootboxes, play-to-win, paid content, DLC’s, cosmetics, or gacha mechanics. It takes a very calculated, sociopathic structure made only to create value for shareholders to make amazing games that will suck the life and money out of people…

You might have noticed this is how MMO’s and mobile titles operate as well. Throwing cyclic mechanics to keep you in game as much as possible. With those tiny dopamine hits you get when the bars in the slot machine of dailies, weeklies, and ever-changing temporary goals get resolved and you have a sweet, sweet digital release when a window or notification pops up screaming “progress!” or “goodies!” at you. In amounts that can never be fully claimed by one person playing non-stop, but… For a price of a small amount of real* money you can skip some of the grind and get even better rewards. And usually the first taste of how much easier and fun it makes the game is free. More and more of the games industry goes that way, because as we established already, most of it is there to make money. And the people who make beautiful and exhilarating traps that snag you up and shake out the coins from your pockets are victims as well. Their drive and passion to make games is being used to exploit those who enjoy the fruits of their labour. Yes, they’re complicit, but there is no other game in town, and they can’t stop playing. It pays their bills, they are suffering from living in late stage capitalism as well. If you have the rare job that does not exploit others in some way, I envy you. And wish everyone could share that satisfaction. But alas, we’re all cogs in the machine, until it finally grinds down and clogs to the point of explosion. But I digress.

We neurodivergents** have it worse swimming in those waters. Every shiny stimulus is multiplied by the way our brains work, and makes us more and more dependent on it. It’s like we were born gambling addicts with no way of detoxing ourselves. Chores pile up, important tasks are forgotten, relationships suffer, because “Just… one… more… turn…” The trap wasn’t set for us specifically, because still, nobody cares about us enough to target such a small poor demographic. But as it often happens, we get hurt by accident, just because the way the world works is not suited for us. And we’re often just innocent bystanders in a hit on the neurotypical who also suffer from such predatory practices, but aren’t that vulnerable to them. There’s just so many of them it will work well enough to syphon money from their accounts into the wealth of shareholders. We get more shrapnel from the heavy artillery being aimed in the general direction of “regular” people.

But oh is the pain so sweet and joyous. We can’t even notice the wounds most of the time, despite bleeding so much that others get scared. Paradoxically, being or growing up poor helps, because we either don’t have the money, or have traumas that stop us from spending even on things we actually need. But it still doesn’t guarantee the craving we get when we see that amazing new costume, or lovingly rendered premium item, or the benefits we could share with friends made in-game, or outside of it. Appealing to the social and aesthetic works on everyone, but we crave it more.

Especially if our lives are dreary and full of toil…

Disclaimer 1: “#3, Gaming while neurodivergent in late stage capitalism”

As you might have noticed, there is no title at the top, because I didn’t feel like spoiling the topic that much. If you’ve read through all of it and felt seen and understood, you’re probably neurodivergent, or undiagnosed. But it’s not a sure bet, a lot of things can make you easier prey, a worse day, stress accumulation, social issues, illness, etc. In any case, I empathise and share your situation, and I wish you and everyone else that the world would change to one where playing games is just a mostly free activity full of shared joy.

Disclaimer 2: My socio-political leanings, and general ground rules.

You might have also noticed my views are *gasp!* somewhat marxist (or even *shudder* neo-marxist!). Well, not exactly. I’m not that enamoured with a long dead man’s theory that was made for a freshly industry-dominated economy, and not a fan of “discourse” and theory for theory’s sake. We’re well into the age of service and digital economy, at least in the “western” world (I’m not sure we in Poland count there, but still). The world has changed, and our understanding of economy and social sciences has expanded, so this is just a modern way of seeing it. Some just think it’s good and there should be more exploitation, and not being among them is a left-wing characteristic. I am decidedly a leftist, socialist, and progressive person, so if this doesn’t mesh with your ideas… maybe just take a moment to think about it and set it not in your, but in a different perspective. If you step outside of your paradigm for a bit, you might notice things are a bit different outside. I’m not telling you to go away, just to think about it, and behave in the comments. There are limits to my patience and tolerance of antics and blind ideological flag waving (even from other leftists).

* Yes, I’m aware money is a construct, but it is also your work, effort, stress, and time quantified. Gamification in a naturally evolved way is here as well. So blame the Phoenicians.

** I don’t have the papers to prove it… yet. Living in the redneck areas of a former soviet satellite state, being poor, and not having other resources sucks. But I’m in the process of getting my ADHD and autism spectrum diagnosis right now, it just hit some snags. But at least I have the final written ADHD/spectrum tests filled out and waiting for a proper diagnosis.

[The photo show worked stone detail at the Malbork Castle comprised of two medieval style figures playing a board game. Photo comes from one of the albums at Malborskie Maszkarony.]